Good-bye Paris

Goodbye ParisThe most valuable thing that I will take away from this year is speaking French. It has always been a dream of mine to know what it was like to speak another language, and I don’t intend to let it go. It has also taught me that I am more adaptable and flexible than I thought. It has been quite an experience to acclimate myself to French customs and manners (and sometimes lack thereof).
It’s hard to look back and reflect on the entirety of the experience, because there were so many moments that meant so many different things to me. I also think that I’m not ready to reflect yet. It’s still my life, my reality. I can’t imagine not waking up in my bed, saying good morning to the princess and the count, going for a run, seeing my friends, going to my favorite bars, just being here. I can’t think about what it meant to study abroad, because right now it just looks like my life.
I do know that when I go back to New York, it will be a shock to no longer have culture shock, or more accurately, a cultural barrier. It will be weird to walk into a party of strangers and just be one of the crowd, instead of the “American girl,” the novelty piece. It will be interesting when there is no longer any language barrier. And I wonder if my wardrobe will stay as centered around neutral colors as it has become.
But most of all, I think it will be weird to be living somewhere permanently. For the past three years I have lived knowing that I will be moving three thousand miles at the end of the year. That means no long-term relationships, friendships, houses, or financial decisions. But that also means, take advantage of everything you have because it will all be over too soon. Will I be as motivated to live life to the fullest if I know that New York will be there next month and every month after that? I hope so, but I think only my favorite French sentence applies, “On va voir, on va voir.”